wait for it...

There's nothing like finding out your child has head-lice to throw your day into disarray. Spending hours picking nits out of Samy's hair was an exercise in patience and compassion. (By the way, I recommend a concoction of olive oil mixed with tea tree, rosemary, eucalyptus and lavender essential oils. Leave it on for one hour. Shampoo and then comb through with one of those super fine-tooth combs.) Just as I was at my wit's end, Samy said the most profound thing. "You know mom, the other day, my friend shouted in the playground: 'I hate Jewish people. They don't believe in God.' I said that I was part Jewish, and I would be sad if she hated me. She asked me if I believe in God. I said that I don't believe there's someone sitting in space watching us. I believe that God is everywhere and in everything beautiful. I believe that God is the goodness in people's hearts."

Thank you oh lice, for giving us this time together.

"Teach me your ways O Lord,
And I will walk in your path.
Give me an undivided heart,
And I will fear your name.
I will praise you,
O Lord my God, with all my heart;
I will glorify your name forever."
Psalm 86:11-1

ch-ch-ch changes

A friend of mine recently reconciled with her mother, with whom she hadn't spoken in years. This was possible, she said, because of how much her mother has changed. This made me thing about my mother. Like most mothers and daughters, we have had our close times and our estranged times. She is the person I turn to first, and the person I push away the most. But one thing is true - she is not the same person she was when I was growing up, and I am not the same person I was when she was a young mother.

This led me to consider how we form opinions about each other based on moments in time. One interaction can color our impressions for years. But really, we are all changing day by day, moment by moment. We mistakenly think of ourselves as having some kind of "permanent structure," when actually our physical tissues are continually being turned over, renewed in a balance between the constant death of old cells and the constant birth of new cells. Our emotions and thoughts are continually changing too -- karmic seeds are ripening and dying, new mental images and habits are constantly being created and destroyed. So the "you" I see today, and the "me" you see, will be different tomorrow.

So it is critical to start fresh all the time. To refrain from judgments and holding grudges. Because tomorrow, later, now, can be totally different. Which brings me to one of my favorite poems:

Salutation to the Dawn
(Kalidasa)

Look to this day!
For it is life, the very life of life,
In its brief course
Lie all the verities and realities of your existence
The bliss of growth
The glory of action
The splendor of beauty.

For yesterday is but a dream
And tomorrow is only a vision,
But today well lived makes every yesterday
A dream of happiness
And every tomorrow a vision of hope.

Look well, therefore, to this day!
Such is the salutation to the dawn.

She Loves Me!

On Wednesday night, after being home from the hospital for a while, my older daughter Mariel called me from Equador to see how the surgery went. Her group (she's there with Global Works) was on its way to dig irrigation ditches in the countryside, and the bus stopped at a gas station to re-fuel. I was so touched that she remembered that my operation was on that day. I don't think that I, at 17, would have remembered my mom having an operation. "She loves me," I thought, feeling blessed to have such a caring daughter. I gave thanks to her goodness, as well as compassion to my mom, who I have so often let fall out of my peripheral vision.