Do Good Be Good

This morning, I had two epiphanies -- the first was that our nature to suffer, to be dissatisfied, to want something more or different than what we have (I call this the "trouble in paradise" syndrome, where, no matter how beautiful the beach and perfect the weather, before long there's sand on the blanket, wind getting hair in the face, people on the blanket nearby are playing their music too loud, etc.), is what makes us human to begin with. That quest to tweak, improve upon, change, is why we're no longer walking on four legs and living in caves. So it's not inherently a bad thing. Actually, it's what brings most of us to the quest for enlightenment: Despite living lives that are about as perfect as anyone could wish for, most of us are still not really truly happy, and we want to change that.

The thing is, we can't change that if we go about it with the same set beliefs that got us where we are in the first place. Those beliefs were good to push us forward on the evolutionary ladder, but they won't get us to the final goal. That is, if we believe that getting more things, a better house, a better car, a better boyfriend, the next generation of iPad, is going to keep away those feelings of dissatisfaction, malaise, discontent, that inevitably crop up, we're making what my teacher calls "The Great Mistake." There is always something we don't have. When we get new things, their nature changes. The new car gets scratched; the new boyfriend has a different set of warts from the old one; the promotion brings with it an annoying co-worker, etc. Because everything changes, the rush of happiness we get changes too. And we long for something else. (Click here.)

This is why every great spiritual tradition teaches that the secret to happiness is 1. realizing that we've been completely mistaken about the true causes of happiness and 2. realizing that making others happy is the only way to make ourselves truly happy. Doing good feels good.

Second epiphany: If I'm going to make this 30 day "ONE THING EVERY DAY" pledge mean something, I have to not only "do good" but "be good." This means taking the vow to "do no harm" very seriously. Otherwise, my actions might cancel each other out, and not have the effect I want them to have. What's the good of doing one good deed every day, if I'm also speaking ill about someone behind their back or being irritable to people? So today my ONE THING is that I am meeting Samy's school's principal about setting up a new sister school program with Escuela Kimna'oj, the new school that From Houses to Homes is building in Santa Maria de Jesus, Guatemala. And my "be good" pledge is that for the next 30 days my cellphone will be in the trunk of my car when I'm driving. No more putting my family and others at risk!

So I will report back as time goes by on the effects of "do good, be good" over the next 30 days. In the meantime, here's an article from WikiHow on How to Be Happy, and also check out this website, which offers the 10 Keys for Happier Living.